August 2011

He has analyzed and pulled it apart. Hoping it’s something that can be explained like a chemical reaction. Endorphins and testosterone react to the light or the dark and fool your heart.

Love = End + test – light & dark = Love

I am more of a dreamer. I am the child endlessly distracted by shiny baubles and leaves shaped like hearts. I easily slide into swoon. My heart guides me more than my eyes. I know i am in love if my heart endlessly bounces from light to dark. Leads me from rage to ravish. Distracts me with it’s ache throughout the waking and the sleeping. Makes me want to wake you in the night and run laughing to the sea, dip our toes in the mighty ocean and just forget for a little bit how this chemical reaction works.

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I’ve been so busy. I hear that all the time. I feel that all the time lately.

I love my new job. I love that for the first time in so many years i don’t have to worry that my bank card will be declined. I love being appreciated by my employers, rewarded financially and emotionally. I have been working my butt off because it feels good to have responsibility and work in a place that i feel so great about.

But, i’m having trouble fitting in all the other things. I’ve started running again. Slowly. The pain from those first four weeks after the marathon is still very fresh in my memory and is not something i want to go through again anytime soon. But, i miss those two hour long runs that cleared my head and helped my heart to soar.

Shane has been busy working on a new album. It’s really great. Every night i go down to listen to the new songs and i feel so proud of him. He’s really such an amazing man. Some new songs are up on his blog Faith My Atheist Love.

We are having some trouble adjusting to this new schedule of ours. Shane is still the early bird and i am the night owl. Trying to find the middle hours, but with the kids off school for the summer we are both run off our feet just taking care of our little family.

I wouldn’t change a single thing. Just trying to enjoy all the little moments and keeping my eye on the winter when i will have two months of unemployment.

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