Sometimes i put little updates on my Facebook page about my running. I always get people saying things like “amazing.” It feels good to get those compliments. Absolutely.
But the truth is there isn’t anything really amazing about my running. There has been persistence and sheer determination. And pain. More pain than i ever could have imagined i could tolerate. Since i started running in earnest, lots of long runs and really training for a marathon, there has been constant injury and/or pain. I can run 10 miles, but i can’t sprint across the street to the mailbox. My muscles are always tight and tender and i spend lots of time limping around waiting for the ibuprofen to kick in.
I go to physiotherapy regularly and nothing could have prepared me for how painful that can be. It’s a “you’ll hate me now, but love me later” thing as my physio said. Right now my left leg is all taped up because my tibula(i think that’s it, the little bone running up the inside front of your leg. sure i could check Google, but meh.) is all funky from running on shin splints too long. Too much running on pavement. And now i could be facing stress fractures if i don’t start running on trails. But first i have a half marathon to do on Sunday.
So why do it?
It feels good seems like a cop out, especially because often it doesn’t feel so good.But i can think of a few things:
~Chasing that elusive great run – where you feel like you could go forever and it’s the most soul lifting place you’ve ever experienced.
~Kicking out the bad thoughts and stress and worry.
~Knowing that you can go home and eat that big dinner without guilt.
~Crossing a finish line. Any finish line. That sense of accomplishment is amazing.
~Just to get the hell out of the house.
~Just to get the hell out of your head.
~To listen to all your favourite songs and sometimes sing out loud or pump your fist in the air and just not care who sees.
~Watch your legs become faster and stronger and more defined than they ever have been.
~Because there is always a new goal. Longer races, faster times, qualifying for something.
~To see someone smiling proudly at you as you cross another goal off your list.
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
that’s why I say you amaze me, I know you hurt but you do it anyway for all the reasons you just said. most people would think of a million reasons not to do it, I find it amazing that you can push yourself through it.
Well, it’s amazing to me. You and your running. As a former athlete turned non-athlete, who thinks starting running (officially) again is just sooooo beyond daunting. And you’re doing it, pain, injuries and all. So that is amazing to me. I know if I had a little more of something inside of me that I could do it. What was it for you that pushed you into actually just making it happen? I should know what that would be for me, I should know, but I can’t find it.
I love how you love to run!
Cindy
It’s your tibia. The fibula is the one behind the tibia. And I have been there. Oh yes I have. But stress fractures heal. If you let them. Enjoy your next race but then take time to heal!! Good luck!