high maintenance machine

As i sit here a mother deer and her little baby nibble on my greens just outside the window, they are both beautiful and gracious and gimpy and clumsy. A getting to know. A learning to nurture and mother.
My youngest daughter has life-threatening allergies. In many ways, after eight years, it's not that big a deal. It is part of our daily lives, but we are all used to it. We are cautious, but carefree. We have our own set of rules and boundaries that keep her safe.
Last night i went out for dinner and then went to watch some friends rehearse their songs. It was fun and carefree. I was thinking, wistfully, off and on about the kids and missing them as i do when they are not with me. Feeling slightly off, like being in the wrong place, or the right place without your clothes. I thought i was having anxiety because my chest kept getting tighter and tighter. It was hard to breathe. I headed for home thinking i could use the puffer and take some holy basil and feel better.
The thing was, i didn't feel better. I kept feeling worse and a peek in the mirror returned upon me a face stricken with bright red welts. Welts that ran down my neck and arms. Definitely not a panic attack. Allergy! The thing is i am totally prepared for this situation with my daughter, but not myself. At this time panic set in for real. Like the high maintenance machine that i am, my body has found another way to befuddle and amuse me in a way that is totally not funny.
So long story short an epipen was injected in my thigh and i got better. I just need to find out why that happened and what the hell i am allergic to. Oh, and purchase more epipens.