I was sitting here enjoying some soup, trying to think of something to write, browsing blogs when i checked out my home page and what to my horrified eyes did appear?
In my Lijit widget the search cloud said in bold "jess is horrible, jess is a cheater and jess is an adulterer." I have been fortunate with this blog to have a minimum amount of nastiness come way, especially considering the content. There was that one time i was featured on trainwrecks.com (gone away), but other than that nothing that has really hurt me.
But those words hurt me. I have removed the search terms from the widget, but i was able to pinpoint exactly where those searches came from and let me tell you, this town is so small. In every sense of the word.
Words hurt. They are like silent daggers that pierce through the heart of someone sensitive. I may have been those words at some point, but i am definitely not alone in that. My actions have been wrong. I know that. I still am, and always was, a good person. Ask my husband.
horrible
Previous post: to write love on her arms
Next post: i pulled my coat tight
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
That’s pitiful someone did that.
Jess, you are loved. To your four kids, you are everything. THEY matter. That sniper who wrote that trash doesn’t matter at all.
We all make mistakes. All of us.
Here’s my Jess terms: Jess is an amazing compassionate soul. Jess is beautiful in every sense of the word; mind body and soul. Jess is human.
Some are spiteful, unkind and uncaring, not to mention unwilling to empathize. You do not fall in that category my friend.
Do your best to ignore those that do.
Whoever wrote that is an immature joke. You did what you did and while it was a bad decision you are NOT a bad or horrible person. People (lots of them) make mistakes. You were sorry and have been trying to make ammends. The only people who should be concerned about what happened are you and your husband.
That little mystery writer should be careful. I have found that fierce, unyielding, and nasty judgements often come back to haunt people by bringing that very thing they hate and judge into their own life. I think it’s the universe’s way of saying “lay off” or “get some perspective”.
Hang in there.
Jess,
I have commented from time to time and have been hoping for your reconciliation. Stephanie hit the nail on the head. I, too, made a similar mistake and by the hands of another (whom I thought a friend, not to mention my own secretary) made a situation much more unpleasant than it already was for those involved, not to mention many, many others. This person claimed to be a good Christian God loving woman who before she decided to “condemn” me for my wrong doing admitted that she herself could see herself being in the same situation due to a loveless marriage. My how quickly she and her daughter forgot when they decided to start sending anonymous letters to others (including the CEO of the company I worked for)….with all that being said – not near the whole story….not even a year later her daughter wound up in the same situation being an “adulterer” (and the one who pursued it) and then her daughter-in-law was involved in a “scandal” of the same nature where she lost her job. So, even given the hurt and anguish I experienced I can tell you that what comes around does indeed go around. My mother always told me “never point your finger at someone because there are three fingers pointing back at you!!!” and to always stay out of others business or it will come back to haunt you. And I think in her case it will just as it did with my “stalker”…..if I ever would have the energy to write the whole entire saga out…..it would be an interesting and good read. I can say that since I’m 8 years out! Good luck to you and your family….I’m rooting for you! And remember, no one is perfect and we all make mistakes!
Take care!
i had seen that… i couldn’t understand that little widget thing & couldn’t understand why those “search” words were there.
i’m glad you found out who did it… people think they are untouchable via the internet & that they can be mean behind their computer screens.
terrible mean people.
Stand tall Jess, you know you can….Does this other person know they can?
that is horrible. i am so sorry.