hopeful

It was my birthday yesterday. All i wanted was a day with my children. A day we could be together and celebrate. Not celebrate me as much as celebrate what i have.
I kept them home from school. That was the perfect start, no rushing around, no lunches to pack.
On tuesday tristan saw the orthopedic surgeon who said her leg was healing nicely and cut her cast down to a much more manageable knee height. So, she was mobile, somewhat, and we piled in the van and headed to town.
We spent the morning investigating every nook and cranny of the museum. Tristan in her wheelchair and the other kids running circles around us. We had fun. We laughed, we learned and we were together. We had a nice lunch and headed home so that i could get to work.
It was exactly the day i had hoped for.
I am not sure of what this coming year has to offer me. I have been thinking and reading a lot about self, personal freedom and state of being. A friend and reader has been offering me small bits of wisdom and clarity over the past couple years and finally it is clicking. I have been making assumptions about myself that were too simple; didn't uncover the real truths behind or under the surface. I am hopeful that this year will bring me some freedom from the thoughts and feelings that have been my dominant theme since 2006. I am hopeful that my path will become more apparent. I am hopeful that my brain will be less cloudy.
I am hopeful.