Now i am done.
All i have done for the last nine days is think about writing.
Today?
Today it is killing me. I am writing about the most painful events in my life. I can't sleep.
I am obsessed. Crazed by word counts and uploads.
I am experiencing the highest highs and the lowest lows. It is cathartic. And full of joy. And self-doubt and self-loathing.
Mostly wishing that this life was someone else's.
I am tired of the pain in my head. Of the love in my heart.
I am grateful to have this experience. To put down in words every single thing that has caused me love and joy, and immense pain and sorrow.
I am grateful to this world, the internet world, for bringing me this opportunity.
Although i may not comment like a fiend, or answer all my emails, i am grateful to all of you, to all the blogs i read, to every single one of you who comments (and i always read your blog), i am happy to be a part of all this.
And so, thank you.
i hate you NaBloPloMo
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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
but you won’t go from here will you?
(she says hoping…)
I’m happy that you are hanging in there even though it is so difficult for you. All the writing, getting the thoughts down on paper, surely it will help.
Sometimes having the worst of it out on screen or paper helps? Or it’s supposed to.
Will we be able to read your November novel? (Sorry, can’t think of the NaNo….and woefully ignorant of the rules)
i’m confused.. but what else is new?! lol
HUGS!
…less than a week to the half way mark…
Hey Jess, I am struggling too. And somehow I have insomnia. Perfect for such a tiring month, hey? I am thinking of you. Username tulip if you feel like a writing buddy…
xo
See, I didn’t even have the courage to sign up for either NaBloPoMo or NaNoWriMo, and I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was 9. You’re doing both. You’re heartier than I, lemme tell ya.
Now I know there’s someone else out there just as obsessed with writing as I am. It’s nice not to be alone.
Thinking of you. Hang in there.
Find the light, look for the bright- and your purple space. The passion.
Bummage, man. Gosh, you know I love you more than is appropriate, so I’ll be missing your daily words but you gotta find what works for you.
For what it’s worth, I couldn’t sleep last night, either.
The writing is more important than the word count. Above all, keep writing!
i don’t always comment either, but i always read. you couldn’t pay me enough to stop.
You have such a talent.
you’re welcome. and thank you.