Options

I try to teach all my children that it's important in life to keep your options open. If you don't like Hide and Seek maybe give it one more try, maybe you'll find someone you like to play with and then you can start a new game. Try your noodles with sauce on them, don't piss and moan that you don't like sauce before you try it. Options. Maybe one pair of undies are "uncomterfull", try another.
I have somehow given birth to the biggest fuss-ass kids on the planet. Eliza refuses to wear underwear and changes her outfit at least six times every morning all the while in tears that everything feels itchy, scratchy, too big, too small… Toby will only eat beige food – french fries, white bread, cinnamon toast crunch, pasta with butter and parmesan, apples (peeled), crackers, cheese and God forbid you let his food touch on his plate. And Tristan, she refuses to use toilet paper when she pees. It's really a problem. Plus, they never listen to me, unless I'm offering up treats, they never listen to me. I'm beginning to think – fuck attachment parenting and bring on the Ezzo's and spanking and God-fearing (mom-fearing) children.
Jesus, no wonder I have 500 bottles of wine on the wall.